How to Deal with Anxiety (3 Tools for Teens)
The video explains that feeling anxiety in certain situations is normal and that there are tools young people can use to help manage the anxiety. The three tools the video discusses are preparation, positive self talk, and reset/refocus. The characters in the video practice using the tools to navigate common scenarios young people face. The video also encourages young people who feel their anxiety all the time – not just situationally – to talk to a trusted adult or therapist. [AMZ-174]
Youth
It is healthy to experience some anxiety – it is your body’s way of preparing you for something you need to do. Historically, anxiety was how our bodies responded to potential threats – in the face of danger, the brain sent chemical signals to grab your attention, and tell you to prepare. In fact, simply preparing for what’s making you anxious is the best way to relieve the anxiety! Sometimes, situational anxiety can be helpful – it makes you find time to study for a big test, or pushes you to hit send on that text message (instead of writing and rewriting and rewriting and rewriting it).
There are many tools and techniques to manage feelings of stress and anxiety to stop it from becoming so overwhelming that you’re having difficulty concentrating. Doctors strongly recommend practicing these strategies to help reduce feelings of stress and anxiety. Learning which tools work best for you can be a life-long skill to navigate healthy relationships and new environments.
Each tool can be used in many different ways. For example…
You might prepare for a stressful test by using a notebook to map out your study schedule, or you could also break big tasks into smaller ones (for example, instead of “write five page paper,” you could think of your task as “write first two pages of big paper before 5pm” and “write next three pages before bed”). There are apps you can download to help you break big tasks into smaller ones.
Positive self-talk can also take many forms. In addition to saying good things about yourself, like “I’m a great athlete,” it’s helpful to flip the switch on any negative thoughts you have. If you think “The other team is too good – I’m not good enough to beat them,” try something like “this is a good opportunity for us to work on teamwork” instead. Or “I’m going to try my best.” It might sound silly, but it really works! Research proves that practicing positive self talk can significantly reduce feelings of stress and anxiety. In fact, brain researchers even found that people who practice positive self-talk like this every day created new pathways in the brain! We can literally change how we think about ourselves, and relieve anxiety in the process.
Finally, if anxiety is so overwhelming it feels like it’s the only thing you’re thinking about, it may be time to take your mind off of it with a little reset and refocus. Sometimes people find the best way to reset is taking a phone break. Going for a walk, changing your environment, or exercise are all really helpful ways to give your brain and body a break, which can help reset your feelings, too. You can also search online for a focused breathing technique that works for you. Since anxiety can cause short breaths, focused breathing techniques are designed to counteract anxiety and tell your body that you’re safe.
Everyone experiences feelings of anxiety differently. If a person’s fear keeps them from trying new things or participating in everyday social situations, then this could be something called social phobia, also known as social anxiety disorder. If a person is feeling stressed, worried, or anxious all of the time and it gets in the way of enjoying things, this could also be generalized anxiety disorder. Talking with a trained counselor—like a school counselor, social worker or psychologist—can help a person learn more about what brings on their feelings and how best to manage them so they can enjoy life to the fullest.
FAQs
It’s super normal to feel stress sometimes, especially during puberty. But if worrying feelings become so intense or happen so often that they get in the way of school, friends, or doing things you enjoy, then it might be a good idea to talk to a trusted adult about therapy. Therapy is a helpful way to understand and navigate what you’re feeling. Asking for help can feel hard, but it’s a really strong and important first step to feeling better.
Feeling anxious is something everyone experiences from time to time, especially in new or stressful situations. It’s part of your body’s natural “fight or flight” response, which helps you stay alert and safe. When this happens, you might notice things like faster breathing, a racing heart, sweaty palms, or lots of worrying thoughts. Some people might feel anxiety more often because of things like genetics or brain chemistry – and that’s totally okay. You are not alone in feeling anxiety, and understanding what situations make you feel anxious can be helpful in learning how to manage it.
Parents
Feelings of anxiety, while completely normal, can be challenging for young people to manage. Parents and caregivers can support young people in navigating situational anxiety by helping them foster the tools described in the video: preparation, positive self-talk, and resetting and refocusing.
It’s important for parents and caregivers to tell young people that some anxiety is normal! Sometimes, situational anxiety can even be helpful. Anxiety is supposed to make you find time to study for a big test, or make you hit send on that text message (instead of writing and rewriting and rewriting and rewriting it). Historically, anxiety was how our bodies responded to potential threats – in the face of danger, the brain sent chemical signals to grab your attention, and tell you to prepare. In fact, simply preparing for what’s making you anxious is the best way to relieve the anxiety.
If your child’s worrying thoughts are so overwhelming that they’re having difficulty concentrating, experiencing sweaty palms or a racing heartbeat, or they’re starting to be grouchy or mean to people, then it’s time to pull out one of the anxiety management tools described in the video, and detailed above.
But if you notice that everyday or new situations trigger overwhelming feelings of anxiety that paralyze your child or leave them unwilling to participate in activities, your child may need extra help. In these cases, you can reassure your child that extreme feelings of anxiety don’t mean anything is wrong with them. They should also know that they haven’t done anything wrong. Let them know you understand they can’t just turn off their feelings or “get over it.” Let your child know that you will work with them to get the support they need to feel better and manage those feelings.
Speak with your child’s health care provider to find a therapist you and your child trust or visit PsychologyToday.com to find a therapist near you.
CONVERSATION STARTERS
- It seems like you have been really sad for a while. Can we talk about it and figure out what we can do together to make it better?
- I noticed that you’ve been worried about X lately. I’d like to help you feel less worried.
- I’m here for you when you’re sad, anxious or scared and want to do what I can to help. Let’s talk about ways I can do that.
- It looks like you’ve been feeling bad lately. I feel sad and worried too, sometimes. There are ways to feel better.
Educators
At different points in life, it is completely normal for people to feel anxiety or worry about something. Educators can support young people in navigating situational anxiety by helping them foster the tools described in the video: preparation, positive self-talk, and reset/refocus. But if you notice a student is struggling to participate in activities or engage socially because of extreme shyness or anxiety, this child may need extra help. Referring a child to your school’s counselor, social worker or informing their parent can help them begin to deal with anxiety, extreme worry, or social phobia.
That said, it is important for educators to tell young people that some anxiety is normal! Sometimes, situational anxiety can even be helpful. Anxiety is supposed to make you find time to study for a big test, or make you start writing that paper (instead of outlining it over and over and over). Historically, anxiety was how our bodies responded to potential threats – in the face of danger, the brain sent chemical signals to grab your attention, and tell you to prepare. In fact, simply preparing for what’s making you anxious is the best way to relieve the anxiety.
If your student’s worrying thoughts are so overwhelming that they’re having difficulty concentrating, experiencing sweaty palms or a racing heartbeat, or they’re starting to be grouchy or mean to people, then it’s time to pull out one of the anxiety management tools described in the video, and detailed above.
National Sex Education Standards
Identify trusted adults, including parents, caregivers, and health care professionals, whom students can ask questions about puberty and adolescent health
Describe the cognitive, social, and emotional changes of adolescence and early adulthood
Discussion Questions
- In the video, what were some of the normal feelings a person might experience in a new situation?
- Why is it important to talk to a trusted adult if you’re feeling overwhelmed by anxiety and self-consciousness in large groups or new situations?
- Who are some trusted adults that a person can talk with if they are experiencing these feelings?
- What are some things a person could say to start this conversation with a trusted adult?